I was afraid that surgery would rob me of my personality. I knew it would change my biomechanics for the better, but what about my tenacity? I pride myself in being tough. I try to bring a passionate, unchained intensity to my training. I never think any farther than the mile I am currently running in a tempo run. The only time, in life, I feel truly alive is when I am hammering the crap out of a run and not knowing if I have enough energy to make it home. Would my fear of another surgery...or messing up my repaired ankle...take away my excitement of trying to catch the boys on a long run just for the glory of an unrestrained, all out long run effort? To be honest, I would rather retire from running then become a timid, conservative version of myself.
Most people will tell you how smart they have become about injuries after surgery. They will tell you how they stop running the moment they feel anything and they never push too hard again. I am going to tell you that I respect the fact that I can push too hard at times and my biggest enemy can be myself, but I will never tell you that I am going to stop training with the excitement of a kid playing at the park. I would never run at my best if I did that. Trust me, I know that not everyone likes training with me. I am beyond intense about my training and it means more to me than I can possibly express through a blog post. On top of that, I literally turn into a kid in a candy shop on workout days. There is nothing more exciting to me than a speed workout or a hard tempo run. I refuse to allow any surgery, injury, or person stop me from running with the excitement that Phoebe had on Friends when she would go out for her jog. If I am not having the time of my life...I should probably pick an easier profession.
|Who ever said a few jokes at a workout to make people smile is a bad thing?!|
|My full on intensity during a track session last summer.|
What have been the results of my “no holds barred” training tactic? Well, I am running far better than I deserve after 15 weeks off. I don’t know if my body was just severely fatigued, from both training and life, or running on 1.5 ankles had a bigger effect than I thought. I will gladly take where my fitness level is at the moment and I am relishing in the fact that I can train without any restraints. 100 mile weeks and hard sessions thrice weekly has become commonplace again. I am confident that my healthy ankle and I will be 100% for a fall marathon and I cannot wait to start racing again soon.